Dealing with a Workplace Bully

Many of us may remember incidents of bullying from our early days at school or the playground.  It was usually some big kid who felt a need to exercise power by humiliating or intimidating his or her target.  As children we were fearful and often felt powerless to do anything about it, so we avoided the bully or simply surrendered until things changed for the better or we grew up and moved on.

However, today many adults find themselves in the same predicament, albeit far from the schoolyard.  Studies have shown that bullying in the workplace is a serious and growing problem.  In fact, according to the Workplace Bullying Institute, up to a third of workers in the U.S. may have been victims of workplace bullying.  It may be no surprise to some that the majority of bullies are bosses.

To be clear, workplace bullying is defined as a pattern of “threatening, humiliating, or intimidating” behavior targeted at an individual or group. It may also include persistent sabotage or manipulation of work, offensive remarks, verbal abuse, social ostracism, or a combination of tactics that have a negative impact on your work and/or health.

Dealing with a bully can be a challenge at any age but as adults we’re certainly much more aware of what bullying behavior is and what options are available to deal it.  Ignoring the problem should not even be considered, as this just enables the bully and can be harmful to your health.  Typically, people in this situation will choose a “fight or flight” response, opting to either change employers or deal with the situation.  Certainly leaving a hostile work environment is the easier option, and this is what many workers understandably choose to do.  However, if you decide to deal with being bullied at work you can take the following steps:

1. Confront the bully – This may be challenging, especially if the bully is your boss, but calmly expressing your feelings or frustration may change the bully’s behavior toward you. Just remember to keep it professional and don’t allow yourself to get into a verbal confrontation.
2. Start and maintain an event log – A claim of workplace bullying should be supported by a record of regular or repeated incidents, so log events to include specific locations, dates, times and statements or actions. If witnesses are involved, be sure to include their names as well.
3. Notify management or a human resources representative – After a series of incidents it may be necessary to get others involved. Notify you supervisor or manager or request to speak to someone from the human resources department and ask for assistance in resolving the issue.

Be aware that responses from employers to claims of workplace bullying may vary widely.  Depending on the specifics of a claim, some employers may take immediate action or the case, while others will allow it to drag on with no end in sight.  If you believe your claim is not being taken serious, or the situation is getting worse, you may want to elevate it to senior management or consult with an attorney. 

There’s no shortage of information about this growing problem online, so if you’re dealing with workplace bullying the first step you may want to take is to educate yourself about this serious issue, as you’ll be better prepared to deal with the situation.  A good place to start is the Workplace Bullying Institute.  (I have no affiliation to this group but their web site is a great resource.)

A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.

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